My Life As I See It

"The Office" made it's triumphant return last night. I was a little worried the show wouldn't/couldn't live up to the high expectations I had placed on it but as always the writers put out yet another classic episode. Here a a few of my favorite moments...

Michael Scott: Ladies and gentlemen, I have some bad news. Meredith was hit by a car. It happened this morning in the parking lot. I took her to the hospital and the doctors tried to save her.. life.. they did the best that they could.... and she is going to be OK.
Stanley: What is wrong with you? Why did you have to phrase it like that?
Oscar: So she's really going to be fine?
Michael Scott: Yes, she has a slight pelvical fracture, but people have survived far worse.
Pam: Thank God you were there.
Michael Scott: I know.
Andy Bernard: Did you see who did it?
Dwight Schrute: No need. We can just check the security tapes.
Michael Scott: Kind of good news bad news there. I was able to be on the scene so quickly because I was in the car that hit her.
Jim Halpert: Who was driving?
[Michael pauses and is speechless]
Pam: Oh Michael.

Michael Scott: My lord my leejze.
Ryan Howard: Yes Michael.
Michael Scott: So I need a little treat for the gang, something to win their affections back.
Ryan Howard: Back? Why is that Michael?
Michael Scott: Well, I ran down Meredith in my car.
Ryan Howard: Ohhhh, did you do this on purpose?
Michael Scott: No, I was being negligent, but she's in the hospital, she's fine, recovering nicely, tiny little crack in her pelvis, but she will be up in...
Ryan Howard: Did this happen on company property?
Michael Scott: Yes. It was on company property with company property. So, double jeopardy. We are fine.
Ryan Howard: I don't think you understand how jeopardy works.
Michael Scott: Oh, right. I'm sorry. What is "we're fine"?
Ryan Howard: Hehhhhh.

Michael Scott: Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I don't know... I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don't sue me... that's the opposite of the point I'm trying to make.

Michael Scott: You know what they say in the Bible about forgiveness. Forgiveness is next to Godliness.

Michael Scott: Why I'm taking responsibility, and it is up to me to get rid of the curse that hit Meredith with my car. I'm not superstitious, but I am a little sitious. (My personal favorite)

Michael Scott: Is there a God? If not, what are all these churches for? And who is Jesus' dad?

I went to Petco tonight and saw the most disgusting things ever. The cashier had a live parrot on her shoulder. As she was checking people out they were all making a big deal about this bird. She said it was hers and the store let her bring it to work with her. I thought, ok, whatever. So when she checks me out she turns around and I see the bird has pooped all down her back. GROSS!!! It was hard and dried on so I knew it wasn't fresh.

Speaking of Petco, the following is an actual conversation I had with the guy helping me:
Me: Excuse me, do you have anymore of the small Chinese algae eaters you had advertised on sale?
Fish Guy: I don't think so, let me check. (he looks in the tank) Nope. Sure don't.
Me: Ok, well then let me have one of those. (I point to some other algae eaters not on sale)
FG: Sure thing. (he get's one out) Hey, you got a good deal, did you know these small Chinese algae eaters were on sale?
Me: What??
FG: Yeah, this week these small Chinese algae eaters are on sale.
It's like we never had the first part of our conversation.

My fantasy football teams are hurting this year. In my three leagues I'm a combined 3-5. Darn you Larry Johnson & Larry Fitzgerald.

I've been really excited to go see "Into the wild" but after 2 weeks of release it still hasn't made it's way to NC yet.

I reserved "Project Gotham Racing 4" for my 360 today. This will be my first real game I've purchased for it. I feel like such a game nerd. I traded in my Halo 2 to go toward my purchase. I figured since all my friends now have Halo 3 and I never really liked it in the first place then what was the use in keeping it.

The office environment at church now is probably one of the best I've ever worked in. Not because we work so well together and we get a lot done, but because it's such a strange mix (in a good way) of personalities and life philosophies. It has to be the most laid back, what-you-see-is-what-you-get church office in the whole town. I love it!

I'm a little bummed I didn't get my magnet collection entered into the fair this year. It was going to be "Magnets from around the world 2". I feel like such a magnet nerd.

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